What's Love Got to Do With It?

A Guide to Modern Love

Archive for the tag “Opposites attract”

Fight Like a Girl

A friend called last night and we discussed a fight she was having with her boyfriend.  From what I know about him, he’s an upstanding man and a “guy’s guy”.  Long story short, she mistakenly assumed that he was ignoring her when his phone was turned off (as he works in a classified environment that requires all phones to be turned off during work hours).  As I pointed out, ignoring someone is passive aggressive and, so far, this guy’s “fighting style” has never been catty or passive aggressive.  Also, people’s fighting styles are pretty consistent. Unless you’re dating and/or marrying someone of the same sex, the verdict is:

Lesson # 16:  Say No to Catty Men

Why?  Because one woman in the house is enough (again, unless you’re with someone of the same sex).  “Men” who are catty or passive aggressive are not really men.  Rather, they are boys in men’s bodies.  As a woman, you want (and need) someone who compliments you and is of generous heart (cattiness and pettiness are the opposite of being generous).  So, again, ladies–actions (or behaviors, in this case) do speak louder than words.  Keep your eyes open and observe and you shall receive your answer (as to whether he is worthy of your giving him the best years of your life).

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Peas in a Pod

Once you have eliminated the time-wasters (TWs) and are dating only marriageble men, the next step is find someone with whom you are compatible.  This is where “chemistry” comes into play.  During this “narrowing down” process, the key is to focus on people who are opposite of you in terms of personality and similar to you in terms of values.  The reason for this is that you need to keep things interesting while living a mutually agreed upon lifestyle.  This is what I call “day-to-day compatibility”.  This is a must-have in order for a relationship to thrive.

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